Desire
In Seven Voices. Ed. Lorna Crozier. Douglas and McIntyre, 1999.
The
books I read function as a kind of divination. What is it I am
needing now, at this moment, this station in my journey? They come to
me, they arrive, comfortably pre-read, as gifts, as loans, by
word-of-mouth, or by serendipity, falling at my feet off the shelves
of thrift stores and secondhand book stores which form the trap line
of my urban life. I cannot afford to buy books new. Library due dates
create too much anxiety. But "used" suits me fine. I read
and enjoy. Some I adopt, squeezing them in to existing rows. CanLit.
Poetry. First Nations. Non-Fiction. History. Art and Design. Others I
return, or pass to a next reader, or donate, or recycle.
Yesterday's
find is Desire In Seven Voices. Six essays and one story, by seven
accomplished Canadian female writers--Dionne Brand, Bonnie Burnard,
Evelyn Lau, Shani Mootoo, Susan Musgrave, Carol Shields, and Crozier
herself. I love the female perspectives, the stories of awakenings,
confessions, even gossip. And the explorations of other desires besides the sexual.
Crozier's
essay--"Changing Into Fire"--is my favourite. Possibly
because our backgrounds are most similar. Possibly because she seems,
she and Shields seem, most aware, most evolved, if you think of that
pyramid of self-actualization. Seeming to have the greater
understanding. Beyond rebellion. Beyond working out unresolved
childhood "issues." I love her line: "How did I learn
to love myself and then love you?" [p.66]
Because
the goal seems to be to explore rather than to define, I am left
feeling teased yet still unsatisfied. This, I suspect, is the goal of
this little jewel of a volume. Experiential.
